My partner doesn’t believe in getting help

By: Linden Porter

Sometimes one partner is not ready to get help with their marriage or relationship issues.

If this is you and your partner doesn’t want to attend a session with me then don’t worry, it can be extremely helpful to attend on your own.

By learning how men and women work differently and use different language styles you will have new ways to interact with your partner.  This will create new responses and, in many cases, solve the issues.

Or it can help create curiosity for the other partner who then feels safe to attend. When they see their partner growing and developing in front of their eyes and they see new behaviours emerging as their new learnings and understandings emerge.

We all need to feel safe in any process and ready to have an open mind to possibilities

This is true in any learning environment. For some they need evidence that change can happen before they are prepared to take the steps themselves. For others they believe that change is not possible and so it’s a waste of time even considering the options available to them.  However finding their partner taking on new ways of dealing with problems will in all likelihood spark their interest.

Getting help won’t help – or will it

People in this place have frequently closed down in an effort to protect themselves from more pain.  They have become numb and so don’t believe anyone can help.  In this place, of course, any idea of help seems alien.

Many also believe that a close passionate relationship should just ‘work’ without putting any work into it.  This is not true.  Passionate close, connected relationships take effort and understanding to keep the passion and connection alive.  Nothing survives without being fed.  Your relationship is unique to you two.  It needs to be fed, and fed the right food.

By taking action yourself your partner will be given the chance to see the possibility of other options available to them.

Take the first step

The first step can feel daunting and, for some, scary – but throughout life we’ve all taken those first steps to where we are now.  The next first step is just another one in the journey through life.  One that may well open your eyes to a future you didn’t dream was possible with the partner you have now.

To help you both I also recommend you download my Free Actions Guide, which is available through this website.

Source: http://lindenporter.co.uk/getting-help/

The article is owned by Linden Porter. Visit site here for other interesting topics about marriage, love and relationship.

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